I must be too annoying 4 u.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Randomize