We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
