Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
