this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Randomize
