guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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