So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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