I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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