so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
