my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Randomize
