if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize