so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
