i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
