oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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