party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
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