Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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