At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
