What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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