the day after is always just damage control
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
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