I wish my penis had an off switch
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
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