First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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