The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize