Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize