would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
