He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
party gras won. party gras always wins.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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