Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Who died my cat blue again?
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
