Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
