North Korea, Best Korea!
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
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