I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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