Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
