Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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