i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
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