We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
