So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
We left the knife in your bed.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
