dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
i think my cat just said my name.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Randomize
