I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
So much Jack, so little girl.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Randomize
