there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
