shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
