Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
