you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
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