i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I want to fling myself into the sun
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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