omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
