I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
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