Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize
