A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
