Plan B is the new Plan A
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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