The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize