what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
