the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
