You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
