i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
