Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Randomize
