Me too!
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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